A couple days ago I went to a diner, for lunch, that has a table full of different hot sauces for customers to use. I cannot tell you how awesome this is for a hot sauce connoisseur like me. I hadn’t been there for a while, so they had a bunch of new ones for me to try…very exciting! Today I would love to share with you the results of my taste tests.
The first step in this sampling session was to order a nice neutral meal that would easily complement a variety of hot sauce flavors. After much deliberation I went with a club sandwich and french fries. I figured the mild flavors here would allow me to explore the true flavors and heat of the sauces the best.
I ended up trying 12 different hot sauces, but 4 of them were in house recipes that I don’t really need to review here because you wouldn’t be able to find them anywhere else. In case you feel like you are missing out on these 4 “hot” sauces, don’t worry, they weren’t anything to write home about.
Ok, so on to the actual, purchasable hot sauces brands and varieties. Subtracting the four in house sauces, that leaves eight for me to review.
8 Hot Sauce Reviews
I am listing these in the order that I tried them, not in order of which one was the best…
#1 Marines Semper Fi Hot Sauce– I don’t know if the Marine’s actually signed off of the use of their name on this, but if they did, they should be ashamed. This is no Man’s Man hot sauce. No heat, and that same old tangy generic hot sauce flavor that any cheap bottle provides.
#2 Lynyrd Skynyrd Habanero Hot Sauce– This literally tasted exactly like the Marine’s Hot Sauce. Again, doesn’t make Lynyrd Skynyrd look too good. I mean are they a rock band or a group of folk singers? Still very little heat if any, and nothing special. I am not sure what is with people putting “habanero” on the label and then obviously not putting any actual habanero in the bottle, but it should be illegal. If you have ever chomped into a habanero, you know they pack some heat, and so should any sauce that claims to use them.
#3 Don’t Be a Chicken Sh** Hot Sauce– I don’t like using fowl language (pun intended) on my website, but hey that’s the name of this stuff. It seems pretty obvious that companies just try to come up with clever names for their sauces and don’t really care about the flavor or heat. Even when they try to make it sound like it’s scary hot. I may be more tolerant to heat than some, but I am not a crazy person… this is just not hot, whether you are a chicken sh** or not!
#4 Hurts Twice Dangerously hot, Hot Sauce– Here we go again. Cute medicinal looking packaging. Makes you think this will be hot, but it’s not. And, to boot, this one tasted like pure molasses…nasty…maybe it would be good on pancakes, but I doubt it. Don’t waste your money.
#5 Blowout Take it Like a Man Serious Hot Sauce– This is getting ridiculous.
#6 Arizona Gunslinger Smokin’ Hot Chipotle Habanero Hot Sauce– A little different flavor, but still not hot. I have had better Chipotle sauces, and again, no habanero heat in any way.
#7 Historic Lynchburg Tennessee Whiskey Jalapeno Hot Sauce– Sounds good, looks cool, and yet it is so sad how these hot sauces keep crushing my hopes and dreams.
Drum Roll Please…
#8 Mexico Lindo Salsa Habanero Roja– And we have a winner folks! This was the only sauce of the eight not made in America. The only sauce of the eight that came in a cheap plastic bottle, and the only hot sauce that was actually hot! And amazingly, it also had the best flavor out of all of them. This was the last one I tried, and I ate it on every last bite I had. Really great stuff. I have 2 bottles of it on the way right now! you can click on the picture below for the link to them on amazon.
Come to find out this company has 6 different varieties, which I cannot wait to try. I am amazed I have never tried their hot sauces before. I highly recommend you give them a try if you haven’t already. I will also add a link to the 6 pack variety pack on my Hot Sauce Shop page for your convenience. Guess we just needed to go to the birthplace of chile peppers to find the best sauce here today…Viva Mexico!!
Hot Sauce Review Wrap Up
So, there we have it. Seven crummy hot sauces I will never eat again, and One I will continue to buy forever. feels like a time well spent to me. They can’t all be winners, and if one out of eight sauces I ever taste are awesome, then that works for me.
It was really nice to be able to try all of those sauces for free with my meal. I really love that they offer that experience for their customers. Not only was is fun for me, but informative for all of you. It sucks to waste 5, 10, 15 dollars on a bottle of hot sauce that they make sound wonderful, only to find out it was a lie.
I hope you all found this helpful and informative. If you have any questions, comments, or suggestions we would love to hear from you. Please feel free to leave a comment. I will get back to you asap. Thanks for reading, and I will talk to you again soon!
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